Mathematics, Chaos, and God

I have made the greatest discovery of my life.

You see, I have spent the majority of my life searching for the mind of God, and I did this by observing the world around me, reading about it, and trying to draw conclusions unfettered by wishful or unsupportable thinking.  I thought that by understanding physics, in particular the underlying geometry of quantum field theory coupled with special relativity, that I might see better how God works and thinks.  Along the way, I came to the conclusion that this Unitary Twist Field idea made a lot of sense, and spent a lot of time trying to show how it might work.  I wrote several simulators and tried to refine the ideas sufficiently–and maintain a Feynman skepticism whether they were workable or just simply wrong.

I still maintain that the main idea is probably right–and was beginning to come up with an experiment to induce a linear twist field.  This turns out to be extremely hard, because the timing of the twist has to move at the speed of light–the twist generator has to be both very small and very high frequency.  I envisioned sort of a prefetch driver mechanism that would charge plates in a cylinder in such a way that the field phase was anticipated.  The assumption is that the rotating field would induce the magnetic portion of the twist and that detectable emission would occur.  The reason I think nobody has built something like this before is that the phase timing of the plates has to be such that the twist propagates at speed c–you cannot make a propagating circuit to do this because electrons will travel down wires at less than the speed of light.  You must design a circuit at multi-gigaHertz frequencies that adds phase to take the slower electron path and cancel it out.  Such a configuration cannot occur in nature or even in antennas of any design.  I have sufficient electronics knowledge that I know how to do this–but it still would be a difficult undertaking.

I was starting down the path of doing this when I watched the movie Pi.  Kind of nutty, but still a good movie, I thought.  A mentally disturbed mathematician uncovers a sequence of numbers that forms the unspeakable name of God and goes crazy uncovering the implications.  He reaches peace only by expelling (literally) the knowledge from his mind.  This movie gets a bunch of things wrong, but the principle is a great one.  First, it claims mathematics is the language of all nature, and second, all nature is based/driven by patterns–wrong on both counts.  Nature is the profound mixture of mathematics and chaos–not everything in it is well described by the language of mathematics.  As a corollary, patterns are only part of the game, intrinsic randomness also drives the behaviors we see in nature.

But the point is still valid–while the “answer” wont be a 216 digit number, the mind of God could be said to take a form that could reside as an abstraction inside a human mind.  That’s what I’ve been doing for about 25 years or so–trying to find that abstraction, or more likely some new portion of it.  Then, the meaning of my life gets some resolution as I get closer to knowing God.

I tried to envision what would happen, like in the movie, if some human succeeds.  Does that become a humanity singularity that is eventually inevitable?  Is that the destiny of humanity–probably not me, but someone will eventually find that key?  I woke up this morning and realized I had my answer, a life changing answer.  Just waking up is a great time to do your mightiest thinking–that emerging consciousness is cleared and refreshed.  I remember doing a lot of thinking about death and what it really means about us and God, and one day walking in a cemetary suddenly realizing “God Is Not Here”.  Answers will not be found in the study of dying–it’s just the point where our thinking stops.

This morning, I woke up and realized that is also true of my study of physics.  God Is Not Here.  Because my leading hypothesis of existence is that there is a way for something to emerge from an infinity nothing (search for my previous posts on scale-less systems and the resulting something-from-nothing process), discovering another underlying structure to quantum field theory will NOT get me closer to God–He is not there.  He might be involved somehow at a higher level, but the creation of existence from nothing is a series of steps that eventually results in the Big Bang and then the evolution to our existence.  My discovery is this:  the discoveries of physics is the process of discovering those steps, but does not point us to God (at least directly).

I have had my life profoundly turned on its head, for the search I’ve so diligently pursued and tried to do as rigorously as I could has come to an end–there is no point other than the pleasure of figuring something out.  God Is Not Here.

Of course, new questions arise from the ashes–then, where is God?  What do I do now?



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